Ut Vivant Alii

I wrote this last year but we are coming up on the anniversary and it was posted on my old blog so I wanted to share before I wrote anything else this upcoming week.

So Others May Live..

I can not imagine being a firefigther. My best friend Stephanie McCarthy, her father Chip McCarthy was an amazing firefighter. More importantly he was an amazing person. This world needs more people like him. I look at the chaos of the world and just think where are the good guys? The otherday I remembered, they walk among us, they are dads, moms, brothers and sisters. Chip was one of those good guys. Chip died Monday morning in a fire on the East side of Buffalo, New York. My sister had her husband call me just to tell me before I heard for myself knowing Stephanie was my double, my best friend, good or bad, miles between us or just feet, Years or days gone by. He said “I don’t know if you heard about the fire, but there are two firemen trapped and one is Chip.” My heart sank and my eyes whelled up and I did something I haven’t done in years. I talked out loud to god. I said don’t do this save him. Get him out of there. Everyone around me knew something was up. Tears streaming down my face. When final word came to me not long later that he was gone. My heart cried. It was instant. This man although not my father watched me grow up. I was at his house six out of the seven days of the week if not all seven. You hear of tragic events everyday and you say wow that is horrible but you never feel it fully until that day it is across the street until it is part of the past 23 years of your life. I wish that feeling on no one. Almost a week later and my eyes still burn from the tears that have slowed but not stopped. The first thought I had when I heard he was gone was to me now strange of all the memories… I remember my tooth. I was racing stephanie on our bikes and I went to turn around in her now grandmother’s driveway and wiped out. I really ate the pavement on this one. Chip came running down the street helped me up and walked me across the street home. When I open my mouth and the blood was spit out, we seen that half of my front tooth was missing. About 15 mins later Chip came knocking on the door. The other half of my tooth in his hand. Said he found it maybe the dentist could reattach it. The dentist couldn’t and my front tooth was half fake up until about a year ago when I recieved a dreadful root canal and they replaced it with a porcelian. Maybe we couldn’t use the tooth but he was that type of person. He was there for you and he searched in grass for half of a little girls tooth. Of course I have other memories like when Stephanie’s school had a outdoor carnival and we (Stephanie, Shannon, Chip and I) got dressed up feather boas and all. I still have the picture. I learned there is always a “but” when talking to Stephanie about guys in her kitchen. He was right, there is always a “but” in life. I say that alot to people because I am always waiting for the but. Trips to get ice cream, softball games, swimming, amusement parks. I am going to miss him even know that I am older and did not see him as often. I still knew he was there for my best friend in the world Stephanie just like my dad is here for me. I knew that if I ever found love and got married Terry and him would be at my wedding. I knew he was a part of my life, I knew he cared. I can not even begin to imagine what Stephanie is feeling. My own father has been sick in my life, and all of this makes me think I don’t know what I would do with out him. Me and Stephanie are similar in many ways and the ways her father was there for her like mine is here for me. Even when are not the greatest daugthers in the world.. when we were worse than the wrost. Simple advice from Stephanie at Chip’s funeral we need to not take our time on earth for granted because someday it is going to be over. I know myself I will love more, laugh more, hug more and work alittle harder toward my goals knowing I have one more angel watching over me. Chip you were an amazing man and will never be forgotten. I am blessed to have had you in my life, thank you. May you rest in peace.


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